November 29, 2016

Life – lost and found

(Also published on the Elephant Journal) A few days ago I lost my phone. It was on silent mode, hence I couldn’t call from another phone and locate it. I had used it that same evening to order pizza. But I couldn’t remember for the life of me where I had left it. So I kept looking for it frantically. One hour. Many hours. Feeling some sort of separation anxiety. Finally I got tired and went to bed, hoping the next morning would bring better news. That day I had been going through existential anxiety bouts since morning. What am […]
November 14, 2016

Getting lovey dovey again!

I am thirty six and in love. This love is different from any kind of love I have felt in my last over three and a half decades. There is a spring in my step. A twirl in my walk. A helpless, almost beatific smile on my face. Not always though, but a lot more often than ever before. At times I am so mad in love that I am happy to completely lose myself in it. The world suddenly seems painted with flowers of spring, red leaves of autumn, blue skies of summer and snow-capped mountains of winter. Being […]
October 9, 2016

Is this a good time?

Recently I saw a video of a guy rolling down a very rough and high hill, the caption of which said “this is how 2016 treated me”. I could say that for my last year as well. I had started 2015 with what logically was the best job of my career. We had bought our first house in Amsterdam that we refurbished exactly like we wanted. Soon after I had signed my book deal. I was doing dance performances with my troupe. I was travelling the world. Staying in the best of hotels. Eating at the best of restaurants. There […]